Rousillon. The COUNT’s palace.
[Enter COUNTESS and Clown]
COUNTESS I shall now put you to the height of
your breeding.
Clown I will show myself highly fed and lowly taught:
I know my business is but to the court.
COUNTESS To the court! why, what place make you special,
when you put off that with such contempt? But to the court!
Clown Truly, madam, if God have lent a man any manners,
he may easily put it off at court: he that cannot make a leg,
put off’s cap, kiss his hand and say nothing, has neither leg,
hands, lip, nor cap; and indeed such a fellow, to say precisely,
were not for the court; but for me, I have an answer will
serve all men.
COUNTESS Marry,
that’s a bountiful answer that fits all questions.
Clown From below your duke to beneath your constable…
Ask me if I am a courtier: it shall
do you no harm to learn.
COUNTESS To be young again, if we could: I will be a
fool in question, hoping to be the wiser by your answer.
I pray you, sir, are you a courtier?
Clown O Lord, sir! There’s a simple putting off.
More, more, a hundred of them.
COUNTESS Sir, I am a poor friend of yours, that loves you.
Clown O Lord, sir! Thick, thick, spare not me.
COUNTESS I think, sir, you can eat none of this homely meat.
Clown O Lord, sir! Nay, put me to’t, I warrant you.
COUNTESS You were lately whipped, sir, as I think.
Clown O Lord, sir! spare not me.
COUNTESS Do you cry, ‘O Lord, sir!’ at your whipping,
and ‘spare not me?’ Indeed your ‘O Lord, sir!’ is very
sequent to your whipping: you would answer very well
to a whipping, if you were but bound to’t.
Clown I ne’er had worse luck in my life in my ‘O Lord,
sir!’ I see things may serve long, but not serve ever.
COUNTESS I play the noble housewife with the time
To entertain’t so merrily with a fool.
Clown O Lord, sir! why, there’t serves well again.
COUNTESS An end, sir; to your business. Give Helen this,
And urge her to a present answer back:
Commend me to my kinsmen and my son:
This is not much.
Clown Not much commendation to them.
COUNTESS Not much employment for you: you understand me?
Clown Most fruitfully: I am there before my legs.
[Exeunt severally]
Act 2.1 | Act 2.3
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