London. Another street.
[Enter PRINCE HENRY and POINS]
PRINCE HENRY Before God, I am exceeding weary.
POINS Is’t come to that? I had thought weariness
durst not have attached one of so high blood.
PRINCE HENRY Faith, it does me; though it discolours
the complexion of my greatness to acknowledge it.
Doth it not show vilely in me to desire small beer?
POINS Why, a prince should not be so loosely studied
as to remember so weak a composition.
PRINCE HENRY Belike then my appetite was not princely got;
for, by my troth, I do now remember the poor creature,
small beer. But, indeed, these humble
considerations make me out of love with my
greatness. What a disgrace is it to me to remember
thy name! or to know thy face to-morrow! or to
take note how many pair of silk stockings thou
hast, viz. these, and those that were thy
peach-coloured ones! or to bear the inventory of thy
shirts, as, one for superfluity, and another for
use! But that the tennis-court-keeper knows better
than I; for it is a low ebb of linen with thee when
thou keepest not racket there.
POINS How ill it follows, after you have laboured so
hard, you should talk so idly! Tell me, how many good
young princes would do so, their fathers being so
sick as yours at this time is?
PRINCE HENRY Shall I tell thee one thing, Poins?
POINS Yes, faith; and let it be an excellent good thing.
PRINCE HENRY It shall serve among wits
of no higher breeding than thine.
POINS Go to;
I stand the push of your one thing that you will tell.
PRINCE HENRY Marry, I tell thee,
it is not meet that I should be sad, now my father is sick:
albeit I could tell thee, as to one it pleases me, for fault
of a better, to call my friend, I could be sad, and sad
indeed too.
POINS Very hardly upon such a subject.
PRINCE HENRY By this hand thou thinkest me as far
in the devil’s book as thou and Falstaff for obduracy and
persistency: let the end try the man. But I tell
thee, my heart bleeds inwardly that my father is so
sick: and keeping such vile company as thou art
hath in reason taken from me all ostentation of sorrow.
POINS The reason?
PRINCE HENRY What wouldst thou think of me,
if I should weep?
POINS I would think thee a most princely hypocrite.
PRINCE HENRY It would be every man’s thought;
and thou art a blessed fellow to think as every man thinks:
never a man’s thought in the world keeps the road-way
better than thine: every man would think me an
hypocrite indeed. And what accites your most
worshipful thought to think so?
POINS Why, because you have been so lewd and
so much engraffed to Falstaff.
PRINCE HENRY And to thee.
POINS By this light, I am well spoke on; I can hear it
with my own ears: the worst that they can say of
me is that I am a second brother and that I am a
proper fellow of my hands; and those two things, I
confess, I cannot help. By the mass, here comes Bardolph.
[Enter BARDOLPH and Page]
BARDOLPH God save your grace!
PRINCE HENRY And yours, most noble Bardolph!
And how doth thy master, Bardolph?
BARDOLPH Well, my lord. He heard of your grace’s
coming to town: there’s a letter for you.
POINS Delivered with good respect. And how doth
the martlemas, your master?
BARDOLPH In bodily health, sir.
POINS Marry, the immortal part needs a physician;
but that moves not him: though that be sick,
it dies not.
PRINCE HENRY I do allow this wen to be as familiar
with me as my dog; and he holds his place; for look
you how be writes.
POINS [Reads] ‘Sir John Falstaff, knight, to the son of
the king, nearest his father, Harry Prince of
Wales, greeting.’ Why, this is a certificate.
PRINCE HENRY Peace!
POINS [Reads] ‘I will imitate the honourable Romans in
brevity:’ he sure means brevity in breath,
short-winded. ‘I commend me to thee, I commend
thee, and I leave thee. Be not too familiar with
Poins; for he misuses thy favours so much, that he
swears thou art to marry his sister Nell. Repent
at idle times as thou mayest; and so, farewell.
Thine, by yea and no, which is as much as to
say, as thou usest him, JACK FALSTAFF with my
familiars, JOHN with my brothers and sisters,
and SIR JOHN with all Europe.’
My lord, I’ll steep this letter in sack and make him eat it.
PRINCE HENRY That’s to make him eat twenty of
his words. But do you use me thus, Ned? must I
marry your sister?
POINS God send the wench no worse fortune!
But I never said so.
PRINCE HENRY Well, thus we play the fools with the time,
and the spirits of the wise sit in the clouds and mock us.
Is your master here in London?
BARDOLPH Yea, my lord.
PRINCE HENRY Where sups he?
doth the old boar feed in the old frank?
BARDOLPH At the old place, my lord, in Eastcheap.
PRINCE HENRY What company?
Page Ephesians, my lord, of the old church.
PRINCE HENRY Sup any women with him?
Page None, my lord, but old Mistress Quickly and
Mistress Doll Tearsheet.
PRINCE HENRY What pagan may that be?
Page A proper gentlewoman, sir,
and a kinswoman of my master’s.
PRINCE HENRY Even such kin as the parish heifers are
to the town bull. Shall we steal upon them, Ned, at supper?
POINS I am your shadow, my lord; I’ll follow you.
PRINCE HENRY Sirrah, you boy, and Bardolph,
no word to your master that I am yet come to town:
there’s for your silence.
BARDOLPH I have no tongue, sir.
Page And for mine, sir, I will govern it.
PRINCE HENRY Fare you well; go.
[Exeunt BARDOLPH and Page]
This Doll Tearsheet should be some road.
POINS I warrant you, as common as the way
between Saint Alban’s and London.
PRINCE HENRY How might we see Falstaff bestow
himself to-night in his true colours, and not
ourselves be seen?
POINS Put on two leathern jerkins and aprons,
and wait upon him at his table as drawers.
PRINCE HENRY From a God to a bull? a heavy decension!
it was Jove’s case. From a prince to a prentice? a low
transformation! that shall be mine; for in every
thing the purpose must weigh with the folly.
Follow me, Ned.
[Exeunt]
Playlist Henry IV Part Two | Dramatis Personea | Plays & Info