Gloucestershire.
SHALLOW’S orchard.[Enter FALSTAFF, SHALLOW, SILENCE,
DAVY, BARDOLPH, and the Page]
SHALLOW Nay, you shall see my orchard, where,
in an arbour, we will eat a last year’s pippin of my
own graffing, with a dish of caraways, and so forth:
come, cousin Silence: and then to bed.
FALSTAFF ‘ Fore God, you have here a goodly
dwelling and a rich.
SHALLOW Barren, barren, barren; beggars all,
beggars all, Sir John: marry, good air. Spread, Davy;
spread, Davy; well said, Davy.
FALSTAFF This Davy serves you for good uses;
he is your serving-man and your husband.
SHALLOW A good varlet, a good varlet, a very good
varlet, Sir John: by the mass, I have drunk too much
sack at supper: a good varlet. Now sit down, now sit
down: come, cousin.
SILENCE Ah, sirrah! quoth-a, we shall
Do nothing but eat, and make good cheer,
[Singing]
And praise God for the merry year;
When flesh is cheap and females dear,
And lusty lads roam here and there
So merrily,
And ever among so merrily.
FALSTAFF There’s a merry heart! Good Master Silence,
I’ll give you a health for that anon.
SHALLOW Give Master Bardolph some wine, Davy.
DAVY Sweet sir, sit; I’ll be with you anon. most sweet
sir, sit. Master page, good master page, sit.
Proface! What you want in meat, we’ll have in drink:
but you must bear; the heart’s all.
[Exit]
SHALLOW Be merry, Master Bardolph; and, my little
soldier there, be merry.
SILENCE Be merry, be merry, my wife has all;
[Singing]
For women are shrews, both short and tall:
‘Tis merry in hall when beards wag all,
And welcome merry Shrove-tide.
Be merry, be merry.
FALSTAFF I did not think Master Silence had been
a man of this mettle.
[Re-enter DAVY]
DAVY An’t please your worship, there’s one Pistol
come from the court with news.
FALSTAFF From the court! let him come in.
[Enter PISTOL]
How now, Pistol!
PISTOL Sir John, God save you!
FALSTAFF What wind blew you hither, Pistol?
PISTOL Not the ill wind which blows no man to good.
Sweet knight, thou art now one of the greatest men in
this realm.
Sir John, I am thy Pistol and thy friend,
And helter-skelter have I rode to thee,
And tidings do I bring and lucky joys
And golden times and happy news of price.
FALSTAFF I pray thee now, deliver them like a man
of this world.
PISTOL A foutre for the world and worldlings base!
I speak of Africa and golden joys.
FALSTAFF O base Assyrian knight, what is thy news?
Let King Cophetua know the truth thereof.
SHALLOW Give me pardon, sir: if, sir, you come with
news from the court, I take it there’s but two ways,
either to utter them, or to conceal them. I am,
sir, under the king, in some authority.
PISTOL Under which king, Besonian? speak, or die.
SHALLOW Under King Harry.
PISTOL Harry the Fourth? or Fifth?
SHALLOW Harry the Fourth.
PISTOL A foutre for thine office!
Sir John, thy tender lambkin now is king;
Harry the Fifth’s the man!
When Pistol lies, do this; and fig me, like
The bragging Spaniard.
FALSTAFF What, is the old king dead?
PISTOL As nail in door: the things I speak are just.
FALSTAFF Away, Bardolph! saddle my horse.
Master Robert Shallow, choose what office thou wilt
in the land, ’tis thine. Pistol, I will double-charge thee
with dignities.
BARDOLPH O joyful day!
I would not take a knighthood for my fortune.
PISTOL What! I do bring good news.
FALSTAFF Master Shallow, my
Lord Shallow,–be what thou wilt; I am fortune’s
steward–get on thy boots: we’ll ride all night.
O sweet Pistol! Away, Bardolph!
[Exit BARDOLPH]
Boot, boot, Master
Shallow: I know the young king is sick for me. Let
us take any man’s horses; the laws of England are at
my commandment. Blessed are they that have been my
friends; and woe to my lord chief-justice!